The ultrasound technician paused, put down her probe, took a deep breath then turned to me and said "I have to tell you... there's something wrong with the baby's head...is there anyone with you?” At that point the world as I knew it began to spin and hasn't stopped....
It had been a journey for my husband and me to that room. After two years of marriage we decided it was time to have children, we had an early miscarriage but forged bravely ahead, praying and letting God know what we desired. We were overjoyed with this pregnancy, but the bumps in the road came quickly.
At the 13 week scan the technician had concerns about the baby's head and facial profile but the doctors assured us that it was 'too early to tell anything.." and so we prayed hard that all would be well, and soon we were back to rejoicing about the pregnancy.
The morning of the 20 week scan, my husband and I had an 'unnecessary fight' he had forgotten about the scan and would not be able to make it. I had not reminded him and he didn't realize he really needed to be there. I stormed off to the hospital in tears. He called and tried to get me to change the time so he could still come but I told him I just wanted to get over with it and went in for the scan.
When the specialist came into the room, the words from her mouth washed over my numb body...I caught phrases like..."severe hydrocephalus", "cannot visualize portions of the brain", "further testing needed: MRI, Amniocentesis". I asked questions got answers, "outcome not usually good”, "unlikely to resolve". When all was said and done, I stumbled from the room dry-eyed, dazed; as I walked down the hallway I dropped the pictures the technician had given me and later had to be called back to the check-in desk when someone picked them up and turned them in. I stood in the lobby and called my husband, as pregnant women with their toddlers and strollers swirled around me.
And then it hit me...my life...our lives... had been changed forever.
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